Globalisation and modern communication technology has brought our planet more closer together than it was let's say 50 years ago. Modern management (a product from America) is being practised all over the world, whether from Anchorage to Zilina, or Reykjavik to Cape Town. In whichever country you come, all managers seem to think and (re)act the same uniform way. Much to the astonishment to any logical thinking mortal being. Most managers look like clones. Let's look at a fictitious scenario (but yet, perhaps not too detached from present-day reality). Setting: A symphony orchestra in despair - a realistic situation, yes - but here comes the modern, eager, pro-active, assertive, ambitious and shrewd manager. Watch him:
Scene 1 (at an office, some panic is in the air...)
Board-member A: Our financial status is causing some concern (= we're bankrupt)
Board-member B: I'll resign from the Board and you'll hire me as an external consultant and I'll give you a solution.
A: will it help financially?
B: yes, guaranteed
Scene 2 (a week later, same office)
B (now an external consultant): I made an case-study, and the solution is to outsource your orchestra. Just look at the flow-charts. Here's our projected budget. This is the time-frame. All worked out for you.
A: Outsource???? Whaddayamean?!?!?!?!
B: Let me explain... The financial problem is, that your local musicians simply cost you too much money. Not to mention your music directors. Well, the answer is; get cheaper ones.
A: Impossible. We have labour unions, minimal wages, fixed overhead...
B: No, possible: We have labour unions, minimal wages HERE... simply get them some place else.
A: Huh?... where???
B. Doesn't matter. Anywhere. As long as it is not here.
A: But we have to perform concerts HERE, don't we?
B: Dear friend, never noticed how we hold overseas on-line video-conferences? Who cares where people sit nowadays?! All you need is a big screen, satellite connection, and the audience won't notice the difference. They're used to flat screens already!
A: Insane!
B: But cheap, that's what you wanted!
A: We cannot do that!!!
B: I promise you a financial solution which will work!
A: Hmmmm... I don't know...
B: Trust me. All worked out.
Scene 3 (B is having a talk with the Project Manager 1 (Change Management) and Project Manager 2 (Implementation Team) in an office some place abroad)
B: did we find suitable musicians?
Project Manager 1: We lack a few instruments.
B: Never mind, it's good enough. At least we safe more costs.
PM1: But it does not meet the customer's requirements!
B: Who cares - we offer cheap prices so they should be content with that! We'll do with this.
PM2: Could I perhaps note that not all musicians are in fact ... er... musicians... I am afraid they hardly know how to play.
B: So what?! They have an instrument, that will do.
PM1: But the customer will hear the difference.
B: We promised that we would provide an orchestra, not quality sound. If they want quality sound, then they would need to cough up more dough.
PM1: Aren't we getting in trouble? How about the service level agreement to the customer? We cannot meet the quality requirements
B: Don't patronise me with service levels! You know what? You're having a negative attitude which badly affects our team. You're out!
Scene 4 (B meets A to prepare the implementation)
B: We are ready to go live!
A: Is the orchestra ready?
B: Yes, as promised
A: Where is it situated?
B: Not important: we found a suitable and really cheap location. People are eager to work, qualified, ... it's a success-story of the century!
A: Can we see it?
B: Sure!
....
(B is switching and adjusting the screen on the wall)
A: I don't see a thing....
B: That's 'cause perhaps our systems are incompatible
A: ??? Explain please...
B: Well, we deal with different standards of video output and versions of software...
A: But what can I do, to see it them then????
B: I would need extra budget for ITC upgrading...
....
Scene 5 (4 weeks later; B meets A to prepare for implementation - 2nd attempt)
B: Aren't you pleased with the view? (Looking at the screen)
A: Er... I expected to see a symphony orchestra
B: That's a mere technicality - a matter of definition
A: But I thought we will perform the same type of concerts to the public!!!! I fired the whole orchestra and now I have this?!?!?
B: Look - they have instruments, right?
A: ... right, but...
B: So it's an orchestra, which you wanted!
A: But not a symphony orchestra!
B: That's retro! This is the 21st century answer!
A: But you promised an alternative, the same stuff.. and a financial improvement!!!
B: This is an alternative all right. Never talked about the same stuff... just a bit different... And the invoices, which you paid, have improved my finances.
A: I think I am getting a bit unwell... Can they at least play???
B: I guess so.
A: what do you mean by "I guess so"??? Didn't you check???
B: Now hear: We never talked about quality - you wanted cheap replacement, because you were in the red. I got it for ya. That was the deal. They got some mass-produced instrument, so they can make a sound, which is basically equal to music. And what would you expect from these people, for such a low wage, you will not get skilled people.
A: I think I am getting extremely unwell!!!!
B: What for?! You got what you wanted! I gave you a solution. It's cheaper than your old situation.
A: But it's not what we had!!!!
B: That's in the past. You have to live with what you have now. This will be the wonderful future of orchestra problems! A wonderful concept, isn't it? By the way - here's my last invoice....
This was just a kind of humorous narration with a certain undertone. Nevertheless, it is a reflection of what I have witnessed a few times and therefore the undertone is not quite funny. The bottom-line: Management is nowadays a bit overrated. Decisions are sometimes nonsensical, objectives out of scope, requirements of the client completely ignored, only to be focussed on short term profits and prestige. And yet the manager is highly and highly overpaid and acting like an untouchable. Outsourcing is, as I described here - fortunately - not an issue in the music world; but somehow, it wouldn't surprise me, if a wiseguy will suggest such a solution... and some orchestra managers in despair enthusiastically follow such suggestion, only to get rid of the burden then to realise too late, what harm has been done....
Managers, and especially orchestra bosses... in fact: all of us! Let's realise what you are managing and what your management school training and guidelines have made you into. Don't end up like this fictitious scenario. Although it is a mirror of two real life projects, this was rather meant as an entertaining summer-holiday reading (although I wonder, who will recognise his/her situation anyway and feel a bit uneasy...).
regards
MS
Scene 1 (at an office, some panic is in the air...)
Board-member A: Our financial status is causing some concern (= we're bankrupt)
Board-member B: I'll resign from the Board and you'll hire me as an external consultant and I'll give you a solution.
A: will it help financially?
B: yes, guaranteed
Scene 2 (a week later, same office)
B (now an external consultant): I made an case-study, and the solution is to outsource your orchestra. Just look at the flow-charts. Here's our projected budget. This is the time-frame. All worked out for you.
A: Outsource???? Whaddayamean?!?!?!?!
B: Let me explain... The financial problem is, that your local musicians simply cost you too much money. Not to mention your music directors. Well, the answer is; get cheaper ones.
A: Impossible. We have labour unions, minimal wages, fixed overhead...
B: No, possible: We have labour unions, minimal wages HERE... simply get them some place else.
A: Huh?... where???
B. Doesn't matter. Anywhere. As long as it is not here.
A: But we have to perform concerts HERE, don't we?
B: Dear friend, never noticed how we hold overseas on-line video-conferences? Who cares where people sit nowadays?! All you need is a big screen, satellite connection, and the audience won't notice the difference. They're used to flat screens already!
A: Insane!
B: But cheap, that's what you wanted!
A: We cannot do that!!!
B: I promise you a financial solution which will work!
A: Hmmmm... I don't know...
B: Trust me. All worked out.
Scene 3 (B is having a talk with the Project Manager 1 (Change Management) and Project Manager 2 (Implementation Team) in an office some place abroad)
B: did we find suitable musicians?
Project Manager 1: We lack a few instruments.
B: Never mind, it's good enough. At least we safe more costs.
PM1: But it does not meet the customer's requirements!
B: Who cares - we offer cheap prices so they should be content with that! We'll do with this.
PM2: Could I perhaps note that not all musicians are in fact ... er... musicians... I am afraid they hardly know how to play.
B: So what?! They have an instrument, that will do.
PM1: But the customer will hear the difference.
B: We promised that we would provide an orchestra, not quality sound. If they want quality sound, then they would need to cough up more dough.
PM1: Aren't we getting in trouble? How about the service level agreement to the customer? We cannot meet the quality requirements
B: Don't patronise me with service levels! You know what? You're having a negative attitude which badly affects our team. You're out!
Scene 4 (B meets A to prepare the implementation)
B: We are ready to go live!
A: Is the orchestra ready?
B: Yes, as promised
A: Where is it situated?
B: Not important: we found a suitable and really cheap location. People are eager to work, qualified, ... it's a success-story of the century!
A: Can we see it?
B: Sure!
....
(B is switching and adjusting the screen on the wall)
A: I don't see a thing....
B: That's 'cause perhaps our systems are incompatible
A: ??? Explain please...
B: Well, we deal with different standards of video output and versions of software...
A: But what can I do, to see it them then????
B: I would need extra budget for ITC upgrading...
....
Scene 5 (4 weeks later; B meets A to prepare for implementation - 2nd attempt)
B: Aren't you pleased with the view? (Looking at the screen)
A: Er... I expected to see a symphony orchestra
B: That's a mere technicality - a matter of definition
A: But I thought we will perform the same type of concerts to the public!!!! I fired the whole orchestra and now I have this?!?!?
B: Look - they have instruments, right?
A: ... right, but...
B: So it's an orchestra, which you wanted!
A: But not a symphony orchestra!
B: That's retro! This is the 21st century answer!
A: But you promised an alternative, the same stuff.. and a financial improvement!!!
B: This is an alternative all right. Never talked about the same stuff... just a bit different... And the invoices, which you paid, have improved my finances.
A: I think I am getting a bit unwell... Can they at least play???
B: I guess so.
A: what do you mean by "I guess so"??? Didn't you check???
B: Now hear: We never talked about quality - you wanted cheap replacement, because you were in the red. I got it for ya. That was the deal. They got some mass-produced instrument, so they can make a sound, which is basically equal to music. And what would you expect from these people, for such a low wage, you will not get skilled people.
A: I think I am getting extremely unwell!!!!
B: What for?! You got what you wanted! I gave you a solution. It's cheaper than your old situation.
A: But it's not what we had!!!!
B: That's in the past. You have to live with what you have now. This will be the wonderful future of orchestra problems! A wonderful concept, isn't it? By the way - here's my last invoice....
This was just a kind of humorous narration with a certain undertone. Nevertheless, it is a reflection of what I have witnessed a few times and therefore the undertone is not quite funny. The bottom-line: Management is nowadays a bit overrated. Decisions are sometimes nonsensical, objectives out of scope, requirements of the client completely ignored, only to be focussed on short term profits and prestige. And yet the manager is highly and highly overpaid and acting like an untouchable. Outsourcing is, as I described here - fortunately - not an issue in the music world; but somehow, it wouldn't surprise me, if a wiseguy will suggest such a solution... and some orchestra managers in despair enthusiastically follow such suggestion, only to get rid of the burden then to realise too late, what harm has been done....
Managers, and especially orchestra bosses... in fact: all of us! Let's realise what you are managing and what your management school training and guidelines have made you into. Don't end up like this fictitious scenario. Although it is a mirror of two real life projects, this was rather meant as an entertaining summer-holiday reading (although I wonder, who will recognise his/her situation anyway and feel a bit uneasy...).
regards
MS
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